Thursday, August 24, 2006

Shhhh!!!! Am a Xtain. Keep it quiet!!!!

Ive been finding myself saying this a lot ever since i began on this transformation journey. Its like a disclaimer in case i goof and look like a hypocrite. If the truth be told this is pay back for my earlier days when i used to yap "holier than thous" who will preach to you all day and make u feel condemned and the next minute doing things you wouldnt expect of a xtian. So now that ive crossed to the other side i dont want to turn into "them" especially when i know my frailties.

But is there any such thing as a holy pure xtian. Simple answer i dont know. In any case i assume it will be quite rare. This flesh we carry about is not helping matters. Now am not talking about outward holiness. That can be faked easily.. I mean what goes on in your head. How you are when the "holy police" are not around.

To be honest this might sound strange but it is not exactly cool to be a xtain. A few weeks back i went to a party and drinks were flowing. Someguy offered me a bottle of Star and i said no. Asked if i drink and i said no. I felt like such an odd ball. Like i was some sort of geek. I wont lie to you. I almost cracked there. I miss drinking i no go lie.

Anyway back to the matter at hand. I prob should not be shy to say am a xtain without a caveat. Not be ashamed to say i read my bible everyday without looking like a freak. If i do things, or say things not xtian like then hey, i aint perfect just "work-in-progress.

Thats all folks easy!!!!!!!!

Friday, August 18, 2006

Close the Door!!!!!!!

In Naija there has always been a fascination with opening doors. Doors of opportunity, doors of wealth, etc. However, i would like to focus on a different type of door. Sometimes in the name of curiosity/experimentation we open doors to things in our lives who like an unwanted guest refuse to leave when you want them to. Try out different vices either to fit in or find out what all the fuss is about. Unfortunately, we form relationships with these things and they just wont leave use.

So that got me thinking. Is it better to never have opened the door to them in the 1st place? A line of thinking disagrees. That its better to get all this stuff out of your system while you are young so when u then decide to be a goodie-too-shoes you are not tripped by it anymore. I think i belonged to this school of thought but (like my other fellow members) i drastically underestimated the effort it would take to close this door. But this view still has some merits. The temptation will always be around. Would you rather gain victory over it while you are young and single? Or be severely tempted when other people are affected eg. wife and kids..........

The option of never opening the door in the first place only works if you dont always run away from temptation all the time. Especially if its always on your mind. To be truly in control, one must be able to stand firm amidst temptation. Running away will only postpone the day when you eventually have to choose between opening and closing the door to certain vices. Obviously, surrounding yourself with temptation everytime is barmy, but employing a strategy of always running away is also equally nutty.

What do i think is the best option? Well to be able to never have opened the door, live amidst temptation and still not fall... Unrealistic. Probably. but if i could roll back the hands of time, that is what i would do.

Phew!!!!!!!!! Now that ive got that off my chest. Gosta go.........